Kelly Gruber Haunts My Dreams
So I started taking a mineral supplement last night called ZMA which is supposed to give you weird dreams and let me tell you, last night’s was AWESOME!!
Okay, let me start off by saying that these ZMA fueled dreams are incredibly vivid and lifelike. The dream started off with me finding out that in a last ditch attempt at saving his job, Jays’ GM JP Ricciardi lured Kelly Gruber out of retirement in the hopes that it would spark a final push for the Jays to reach the playoffs for the first time since 1993.
So naturally I order tickets right away and since it is such a momentous occasion, I empty my pockets and get the special TD Canada-Trust seats that are right on the field. AND I find out that Kelly gets to ass-kick the Yankees. When I get there, much to my dismay, Kelly Gruber’s ass is glued to the bench (I know, at this point I should have realized it was a dream/nightmare but it kept on going thankfully). Fast forward to the bottom of the 9th, tie game, Mariano Rivera pitching for theYankees and Kelly is subbed in for 3B Hector Luna. First pitch he scorches into left field for a base hit. Next up is Johnny Mac and first pitch he sees Kelly is moving those 40+ year old legs as fast as he can. Surprise surprise, Kelly moves faster than Jose Reyes!! He stands up easily on second. Next pitch and Kelly is on the move again! This time a patented head-first slide that gets both his uniform and face dirty. Johnny Mac, being the stud that he is, lays down a bunt 0-2 for the suicide squeeze and keeps it in fair territory enough for Kelly to scamper home and win the game! The out of town scoreboard says the Jays are 2 back of a wildcard with 3 left to play the Yankees! AND the next starting 3 are Halladay, Burnett and McGowan! As I stared at the “2 GB” I thought to myself….. wait a minute, this is September and the Jays aren’t at least 12 out?! What is going on here? It is at that point that I woke up. Regardless, still best dream ever.